I have killed.
I have taken lives. Yes. LIVES. Lives snuffed in an instant. Lives reaped like so much wheat on the blade.
I am damned. The Catholic Church says I am going to hell. I guess I should. I am to be branded. Excommunicated.
I am become Death. Destroyer of worlds.
I shall weep for every one of those lives. Lives of my children. Of my once-future progeny.
A tear shed for every little wriggly one.
Farewell my sperm, may you rest well in your downy tissue cradle.
Games, art, life and anything else that spills out of my head that really, really shouldn't get out...
Showing posts with label Rant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rant. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Monday, May 9, 2011
Project 365: Day 92 - Word of Caution - Toaster Ovens
Reeeeeeeeeeeaally stupid move by me today.
Used my toaster oven to cure greenstuff on my Trollblood longriders. I've done this before several times without incident.
About 30 seconds in I hear a wet splat.
I see steam and a puddle of silver on the ceramic plate I was curing on.
The longriders pretty much exploded.
I didn't even have the toaster oven up very high. Since the minis were hollow and a bit old I suspect the minis had some water in them that steamed up.
argh.
:P lesson learned and money down the drain for me.
At least I didn't ruin the toaster oven
Used my toaster oven to cure greenstuff on my Trollblood longriders. I've done this before several times without incident.
About 30 seconds in I hear a wet splat.
I see steam and a puddle of silver on the ceramic plate I was curing on.
The longriders pretty much exploded.
I didn't even have the toaster oven up very high. Since the minis were hollow and a bit old I suspect the minis had some water in them that steamed up.
argh.
:P lesson learned and money down the drain for me.
At least I didn't ruin the toaster oven
Friday, May 6, 2011
Project 365: Day 91 - Kaldor Draigo - Grey Knight WIP
Jeff asked me to paint his Grey Knight character Kaldor Draigo. Seeing as this is a figure I haven't painted before I jumped on the opportunity.
From the message boards that I've visited, a lot of folks prefer to work with plastic rather than metals. Some people had very strong opinions about this and I found it a bit odd. I started out in the hobby working with Privateer Press metals and aside from the usual bent shafts and pinning I really didn't see a lof of trouble with metals to warrant such a reaction from folks.
I then realized that it may be because these folks were exposed to GW metal figures instead.
The mess of tabs and vents werent the worst of it though. GW metal is significantly harder than Privateer metals and as a result, drilling was a lot more tedious and carpal tunnel -inducing. I'm normally a careful driller (I still have small drillbits from about 2 years ago) and I snapped 3 of my good drillbits on this fig alone :p. Ick.
I did manage to assemble the sucker and I'll be posting on his progress over the next few days.
Stay tuned.
From the message boards that I've visited, a lot of folks prefer to work with plastic rather than metals. Some people had very strong opinions about this and I found it a bit odd. I started out in the hobby working with Privateer Press metals and aside from the usual bent shafts and pinning I really didn't see a lof of trouble with metals to warrant such a reaction from folks.
I then realized that it may be because these folks were exposed to GW metal figures instead.
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| The figure itself is very ornate and looks like a fun test of skill, albeit a bit cluttered and busy in parts |
 |
| As i started cataloging the items I started noticing some of the things I'll have to fix as I go alone. here you'll notice the heavy pitting on the cloth. This will have to be milliput slurried smooth |
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| Heavy pitting on the back cloth as well |
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| A huge tab on the shield that will be very dangerous to cut with a craft knife. I wish I had a jeweler's saw... |
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| Another huge tab. GW must charge for the weight of the metal... |
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| Now this is what really ticked me off. I thought the top of the banner had a very tall decoration but as i looked at it more and compared it with the GW pic I noticed I was staring at another honking tab! |
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| The tab was thicker than the actual part! |
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| Aside from that I also noticed these huge vent spikes all over the fig... I have pictures of them in different places but after literally the 15th one, I decided to give up taking pictures of them. The sad part here is that there are probably a few others I've missed that will show up AFTER I prime the figure |
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| This has to be the worst though. The tip of the sword was miscast. Now I've heard of good things from GW customer service and I could get this replaced but thats just way too much trouble and time on my part. I'm better off filing this thing to shape. |
The mess of tabs and vents werent the worst of it though. GW metal is significantly harder than Privateer metals and as a result, drilling was a lot more tedious and carpal tunnel -inducing. I'm normally a careful driller (I still have small drillbits from about 2 years ago) and I snapped 3 of my good drillbits on this fig alone :p. Ick.
I did manage to assemble the sucker and I'll be posting on his progress over the next few days.
Stay tuned.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Project 365: Day 86 - I'm tired of being mad
One way or another, everyone ends up in a conflict situation.
If you're even a little bit like me you'll end up in a lot of them. Most of the time I just dig my heels in and see everything to the bitter end. Scorched earth if need be. I may not be 100% right all of the time but I sure as hell do believe so during those situations
Sometimes though you just get tired of the drama and you just want to offer the olive branch and make peace. Especially when you're not entirely sure what the conflict is about and when you're dealing with someone you thought was a friend and dear to those you consider friends.
It's not about being the bigger man in this case. You really just want to patch things up. It matters ya know?
But then after offering the sign of peace, they slap your hand and just remain...unreasonable and passive aggressive.
Do I deserve it? Maybe. Regrets? Not getting the chance to talk things through.
But I'm just tired of being mad. I'm just done with that now. Especially since I wasn't mad in the first place.
I'll try walking away from this one and see where it gets me.
If you're even a little bit like me you'll end up in a lot of them. Most of the time I just dig my heels in and see everything to the bitter end. Scorched earth if need be. I may not be 100% right all of the time but I sure as hell do believe so during those situations
Sometimes though you just get tired of the drama and you just want to offer the olive branch and make peace. Especially when you're not entirely sure what the conflict is about and when you're dealing with someone you thought was a friend and dear to those you consider friends.
It's not about being the bigger man in this case. You really just want to patch things up. It matters ya know?
But then after offering the sign of peace, they slap your hand and just remain...unreasonable and passive aggressive.
Do I deserve it? Maybe. Regrets? Not getting the chance to talk things through.
But I'm just tired of being mad. I'm just done with that now. Especially since I wasn't mad in the first place.
I'll try walking away from this one and see where it gets me.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Project 365: Day 69 - Yes it does.
Taking a picture of a flower DOES make you a photographer
Drawing a stick figure DOES make you a cartoonist
Running 30 minutes a day DOES make you a runner
Writing something that begins with "roses are red" DOES make you a poet
...
it wont make you a good one though.
Savvy? ;)
note: Regular programming to resume once I get my hands on a digital camera again.
Drawing a stick figure DOES make you a cartoonist
Running 30 minutes a day DOES make you a runner
Writing something that begins with "roses are red" DOES make you a poet
...
it wont make you a good one though.
Savvy? ;)
note: Regular programming to resume once I get my hands on a digital camera again.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Project 365: Day 68 - I'm done with you.
I'm sick of you. I'm sick of your lies. I'm sick of your drama and your self importance. I'm sick of how when you make your choices, we always get left behind. Yet every single time you expect us to be there when you mess up or need help.
I know you're not worried. You will always have people to watch over you, people to fawn over you and people who will believe the tales that you twist like ribbons your hair could never hold when you were younger.
It's funny how a little statement from you is all it took for me to realize this. Admittedly, it was an off colored joke on my part that started it all. But what followed just showed me how petty, vindictive and ugly you are.
Don't make the mistake of thinking I'm upset due to someone else' honor. Your battles and quarrels are your own. What made me break was the fact that you would go straight for the jugular without thinking. how you would let loose a low blow so freely. How you would not hesitate to go after someone else just to hurt me.
I've always held back because of a sense of obligation and a sense of family. I now see that I don't have to.
I owe you nothing.
And from here on I will feel nothing for you.
Good luck.
I'm done with you.
I know you're not worried. You will always have people to watch over you, people to fawn over you and people who will believe the tales that you twist like ribbons your hair could never hold when you were younger.
It's funny how a little statement from you is all it took for me to realize this. Admittedly, it was an off colored joke on my part that started it all. But what followed just showed me how petty, vindictive and ugly you are.
Don't make the mistake of thinking I'm upset due to someone else' honor. Your battles and quarrels are your own. What made me break was the fact that you would go straight for the jugular without thinking. how you would let loose a low blow so freely. How you would not hesitate to go after someone else just to hurt me.
I've always held back because of a sense of obligation and a sense of family. I now see that I don't have to.
I owe you nothing.
And from here on I will feel nothing for you.
Good luck.
I'm done with you.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Project 365: Day 55 - The WBC: The Next Generation
I fear for the kids.
more here:
http://www.youtube.com/user/jaywolfe82#grid/user/8BB4ED7ACC5E4763
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Project 365: Day 46 = Love, hugs and pixie dust
I look at the world around me and I look at my own country, and I realize I still have it good. I'm still free to chuck dice and play with friends, I can still come home late without being arrested, my internet isn't regulated (YET!) and I don't have to dodge bullets everyday.
Maybe one day that'll change for the worse.
But if I don't pray and hope and work for the best right now I might as well just put a bullet through my brain and get it over with.
Giving up is easy because you've allowed yourself to move on and leave the problems behind.
Having faith and hope for your country, working for it, even while under retarded leaders and surrounded by apathetic Filipinos-by-convenience... well that takes effort.
Faith, hope and country = love, hugs, and pixie dust?
Try blood, sweat and tears.
Maybe one day that'll change for the worse.
But if I don't pray and hope and work for the best right now I might as well just put a bullet through my brain and get it over with.
Giving up is easy because you've allowed yourself to move on and leave the problems behind.
Having faith and hope for your country, working for it, even while under retarded leaders and surrounded by apathetic Filipinos-by-convenience... well that takes effort.
Faith, hope and country = love, hugs, and pixie dust?
Try blood, sweat and tears.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Project 365: Day 44 - I'm way behind on this blog
I swear I'm not neglecting this blog. I'm just getting some things out of the way, also I dont have a camera to take pics for the update. Once I solve those problems though, I'll be updating this mofo fo sho! ... good gravy I feel dirty for saying that.
In the meantime, here's something i stumbled upon. Now normally, I wont be watching these kind of videos and the voice alone made me want to stab an xacto into my ear...but a minute in and it turned golden :)
enjoy
In the meantime, here's something i stumbled upon. Now normally, I wont be watching these kind of videos and the voice alone made me want to stab an xacto into my ear...but a minute in and it turned golden :)
enjoy
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Project 365: Day 36 - So I was supposed to be working on stuff tonight...
..then ADHD kicked in and decided I'd check out something that EJ told me about over the weekend.
I now place this curse upon you:
There are a few more links but I'm afraid it'll suck you in more and you wont be able to come out unscathed.
For those who cant understand, you have no idea how lucky you are.
For those who do... God help us all.
Please do note that this is NOT a 40k vs WM/H clusterfuck. Lets get that out of the way right now. This is not about whats the better game. What this is about is some guy who thinks he can apply his 40k epeen status and knowhow to a different game system.
"Why is this a bad thing?" I hear some of you ask. Aside from the obvious apples vs oranges dealie, you have a guy who:
* expects to translate his 40k success to WM/H
* draws conclusions, parallels and opinions on a fundamentally flawed understanding of WM/H (umm getting hit by a -2 def debuff is a BIG thing in WM/H)
* refuses to acknowledge the second bullet point :p
Whats worse is that he has a website of his own and can preach his gospel to millions of people. Ouch.
I could go on but I already lost a few hours keeping up with this guy. It's morbidly fascinating.
I now place this curse upon you:
There are a few more links but I'm afraid it'll suck you in more and you wont be able to come out unscathed.
For those who cant understand, you have no idea how lucky you are.
For those who do... God help us all.
Please do note that this is NOT a 40k vs WM/H clusterfuck. Lets get that out of the way right now. This is not about whats the better game. What this is about is some guy who thinks he can apply his 40k epeen status and knowhow to a different game system.
"Why is this a bad thing?" I hear some of you ask. Aside from the obvious apples vs oranges dealie, you have a guy who:
* expects to translate his 40k success to WM/H
* draws conclusions, parallels and opinions on a fundamentally flawed understanding of WM/H (umm getting hit by a -2 def debuff is a BIG thing in WM/H)
* refuses to acknowledge the second bullet point :p
Whats worse is that he has a website of his own and can preach his gospel to millions of people. Ouch.
I could go on but I already lost a few hours keeping up with this guy. It's morbidly fascinating.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Project 365: Day 30 - I'm free!
I'm finally free of that goddamn project. I'm finally going to settle down into my old job.
But why am I still anxious?
Maybe because I KNOW the folks I left behind aren't ready
Maybe because what I leave behind is a legacy. It reflects on me
Maybe I just cant be comfortable being relieved when I know some people around me are facing dilemmas of their own.
Urgh.
But why am I still anxious?
Maybe because I KNOW the folks I left behind aren't ready
Maybe because what I leave behind is a legacy. It reflects on me
Maybe I just cant be comfortable being relieved when I know some people around me are facing dilemmas of their own.
Urgh.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Project 365: Day 15 - Rant - Performance Appraisal
We're supposed to be completing our Annual Performance Appraisal at work. I always find this process awkward and annoying. While I understand its necessary, what makes the process uncomfortable for me is that a part of the process is a "Self Assessment" - you're supposed to be reviewing how you performed in the past year and write down your goals for the next.
I really can't look at my performance objectively at all. At times i really just want to write down : "Yes I could've done more that past year but I really don't think you're paying me enough right now to get my 100%. No, I dont really have any goals for the next year. I'm happy with what I'm doing and I'm generally okay with what I get for the effort I put in. My bigger Goals really dont involve the company at all..." How could you say that without getting fast tracked out of the company? If I were a a manager I'd fire my sorry ass.
This year is whole new level of awkward because aside from all of the above, they're asking us to rate ourselves against a SCALE. 5 is the highest and 1 the lowest.
Really?
I dunno if they really thought this through because when I try to give myself a score the following thoughts come to mind:
5 - "I dont think so..." - Note : Your boss will always, ALWAYS have something negative to say about how you perform. If not, they shouldnt be your boss anyway
4 - " Hahahahahahahahahaha....PROVE IT!"
3 - "You're not putting enough effort into this appraisal are you?"
2 - "Why did we hire you again? Maybe we can get someone better"
1 - "This assessment isnt a joke, son..."
Urgh.
I really can't look at my performance objectively at all. At times i really just want to write down : "Yes I could've done more that past year but I really don't think you're paying me enough right now to get my 100%. No, I dont really have any goals for the next year. I'm happy with what I'm doing and I'm generally okay with what I get for the effort I put in. My bigger Goals really dont involve the company at all..." How could you say that without getting fast tracked out of the company? If I were a a manager I'd fire my sorry ass.
This year is whole new level of awkward because aside from all of the above, they're asking us to rate ourselves against a SCALE. 5 is the highest and 1 the lowest.
Really?
I dunno if they really thought this through because when I try to give myself a score the following thoughts come to mind:
5 - "I dont think so..." - Note : Your boss will always, ALWAYS have something negative to say about how you perform. If not, they shouldnt be your boss anyway
4 - " Hahahahahahahahahaha....PROVE IT!"
3 - "You're not putting enough effort into this appraisal are you?"
2 - "Why did we hire you again? Maybe we can get someone better"
1 - "This assessment isnt a joke, son..."
Urgh.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Project 365: Day 14 - Running out of steam...
So the search for the camera charger continues. I might resort to just borrowing Roxane's digicam for some of the stuff i plan to do :(
...and I have to admit I'm kinda running out of steam.
The good thing though is that this feeling was fleeting. Hopefully I wouldn't encounter that drained feeling again for some time. While I was typing this article I actually felt the fatigue of the day fade away and in it's place was the excitement for some of the stuff I plan to do.
I'm looking to post more doodles, put up some more modeling logs and go on more food adventures with Roxane. I have a lot planned for this blog and I think I'm on to something good. For now mainly it's something good for me as it has given me my second wind creativity wise. In the future, for my current (all 3 of you...) and future readers I hope what I have in this blog will be something good for you as well.
Stay tuned.
...and I have to admit I'm kinda running out of steam.
The good thing though is that this feeling was fleeting. Hopefully I wouldn't encounter that drained feeling again for some time. While I was typing this article I actually felt the fatigue of the day fade away and in it's place was the excitement for some of the stuff I plan to do.
I'm looking to post more doodles, put up some more modeling logs and go on more food adventures with Roxane. I have a lot planned for this blog and I think I'm on to something good. For now mainly it's something good for me as it has given me my second wind creativity wise. In the future, for my current (all 3 of you...) and future readers I hope what I have in this blog will be something good for you as well.
Stay tuned.
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